A month-old post from Reddit is currently dividing the internet over what it actually means to be a decent human being. Long story short, a hungry photographer was denied food at the wedding so they deleted all the photos they took. The dilemma was posted over at the subreddit r/AmItheA**hole for 3.1 million members to decide if this photographer’s deeds (or misdeeds) were justified. And now the internet questions: Is it okay to not feed your wedding photographers? Is it okay for the said photographer to delete all your wedding photos just because you didn’t feed them?
What on earth happened?
The original poster (OP), who is actually a dog groomer, was asked to be the photographer for a friend’s wedding. The whole event was supposed to be an 8.5-hour gig. After running around and shooting photos in an AC-less venue, OP wanted to eat, but was told by the groom that they couldn’t, since they’re the photographer. On top of that, the photographer also found out there wasn’t any spot for them at any table.
When they told the groom that they needed a short break to go find something to eat, the groom told them they “need to be a photographer or leave without pay.” By this point, we imagine the photographer must have been narrowing their eyes in annoyance. After confirming if that was indeed what the groom wanted, the photographer deleted all the photos from the camera in front of the groom and walked away.
(NTA = not the a**hole)
If you’re wondering how much the amateur photographer walked away from, it’s was $250 or roughly PHP 12,729.75. That’s how much they were lowballed in the name of a “favor for a friend.” For reference, a wedding photographer’s rates in the Philippines range from PHP 40,000 to PHP 100,000+++.
Were they rude?
That “friend” is a horrible person. How do you expect anyone, let alone a friend, work that many hours with no break? I would’ve left and deleted the pics I took, too.
— 🇩🇴 Don’t DM me. I’m not interested. (@HarlemMC) October 6, 2021
No. If someone is rude here, it’s the groom who got his photos deleted. As Pinoy Gen Z would put it: ✨ dasurv ✨ (deserve). No decent friend (let alone a decent person) would force an amateur photographer to work for a solid 8 hours and not give them food. We’re glad to see that Reddit and Twitter have collectively condemned the groom and his questionable morals. Faith in humanity restored?
The internet has got the photographer’s back
The fact that FEEDING ur wedding photographer is even a debate is telling me you lot weren’t raised right
— 🦋midoriya🦋 (@kemz_1) October 6, 2021
OP posted on Reddit to ask strangers and they came thru. Thousands commented how horrible a “friend” the groom was and that the dogs they groomed would’ve been better.
Everybody at my wedding will be given a plate. Idc if I’m paying you for a service…go to that table and get a plate and I promise even my family gone make sure your plate full. You better hit that bar too.
— Cydney😈 (@cyyddd) October 6, 2021
they in charge of capturing one of the most important days of your life, gave you a discount, and you finna fuck wit them like that? im takin everyones jacket, her veil, and flattening the limo tires, now where you finna go? 🤨
— 🎭sgt. ass (@lCYMEGAN) October 6, 2021
I would’ve taken my time to photoshop Nicholas Cage on their faces and post them everywhere. I do not blame this man AT ALL.
— tori. (@toricantstfu) October 6, 2021
“They shouldn’t have deleted the photos”
It’s the fact that he DELETED all the photos…. those are precious memories.
— Quarantina (@MaybeonMarsx) October 6, 2021
On the other side of the fence is Team That Was Unnecessary. “Those are precious memories,” said one shocked Twitter user. Fair enough. But it was also the photographer’s well-being on the line here.
The “photographer” isn’t even a photographer lmaoo just a friend helping out. If that’s how you treat your friend who is helping you out then you were raised wrong
— my burner (@myburne75631908) October 6, 2021
Some people still think the groom was right and the photographer was entitled for wanting a break. The audacity!
A better alternative
Biruin mo na and lahat, ‘wag lang ‘yung gutom.
How to prevent that scenario from happening to you
LESSON HERE KIDS CHARGE FOR YOUR SERVICES FRIENDS OR NOT!!!!! 💸
— !!!GUTZ~OVER~FEAR!!!🌠 (@stillsmokin617) October 6, 2021
PSA to all the photographers or business owners out there: Make a contract for your business deals and make sure they’re signed. It doesn’t matter if it’s between you and a friend or a family member, a contract lays the ground rules and boundaries that might just save you in the future. If OP made one, they could’ve clarified the meal inclusion and the breaktimes.
PSA to engaged couples: Feed your wedding photographers
Literally, photographers are there the ENTIRE day. From the time you start getting ready until the time the reception is over. They do 10+ hours easily that day, and you can’t give them a plate? Include them eating in your budget and if you can’t afford it you need to downsize
— Tay🐾 (@Taymoneywhite) October 6, 2021
This should go without saying and we believe no Filipino couple would withhold anyone’s food at their wedding. Sometimes even venue security guards get a plate if there are still leftovers. Reserving plates for your wedding photographer, planner, and other people who help put your big day together is the decent thing to do because we’re all humans.
TLDR: Yes, photographers should be fed
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