8List.ph
  • Lockdown Diaries
    • Updates
    • Good News
    • Life Under Quarantine
    • Humor
    • Health Tips
  • News
    • Opinion
    • People
  • Pop
    • Movies
    • Music
    • TV
    • Books
    • Theater
    • Showbiz
    • Geek
    • Sports
    • Retro
    • Weird
  • Life
    • Health
    • Nest
    • Life-Hacks
    • Food & Drink
    • Travel
    • Style
      • Beauty
      • Inspiration
      • Shop
      • OOTD
  • Videos
    • Filgood
    • Isabuhay Ang Panata
    • #8MinutesWith
    • Pagsubeks
    • 8list Plays
    • 8List Asks
    • 8List Explores
    • 8List Presents
    • 8secs
    • 88 Seconds
    • YOUth DECIDE
    • Str8 Up with Delamar
    • Toughest Job 2016
  • Comics
    • H8 Mondays
  • Breathe
  • #YOUthDECIDE
  • About
  • Sitemap
  • Advertise
  • Privacy
  • Archive
  • Bitesized.ph
  • Windowseat.ph

 

 

 

8List.ph is published by ID8, Inc.

Subscribe
8List.ph
8List.ph
  • Lockdown Diaries
    • Updates
    • Good News
    • Life Under Quarantine
    • Humor
    • Health Tips
  • News
    • Opinion
    • People
  • Pop
    • Movies
    • Music
    • TV
    • Books
    • Theater
    • Showbiz
    • Geek
    • Sports
    • Retro
    • Weird
  • Life
    • Health
    • Nest
    • Life-Hacks
    • Food & Drink
    • Travel
    • Style
      • Beauty
      • Inspiration
      • Shop
      • OOTD
  • Videos
    • Filgood
    • Isabuhay Ang Panata
    • #8MinutesWith
    • Pagsubeks
    • 8list Plays
    • 8List Asks
    • 8List Explores
    • 8List Presents
    • 8secs
    • 88 Seconds
    • YOUth DECIDE
    • Str8 Up with Delamar
    • Toughest Job 2016
  • Comics
    • H8 Mondays
  • Breathe
  • #YOUthDECIDE
  • Pop

8 Marvel Characters You’ll Probably Never See in a Movie

  • Posted on Nov 28, 2016Jan 26, 2018
  • 0 minute read
  • Mikhail Lecaros
Total
1
Shares
1
0
0

8 Marvel Characters You’ll Probably Never See in a Movie

By Mikhail Lecaros

Moments from Volleyfriends UAAP Volleyball Kick Off SHAD

Over 8-and-a-half years, 14 films, and various TV shows, the Marvel Cinematic Universe has brought to life characters and situations comic book fans never thought they would ever live to see in live action. But while big ticket names like Wolverine and Spider-Man or former B-listers like Star Lord and Luke Cage enthrall audiences on screens big and small, there remain a considerable number that we will most likely never see.

Of course, these days, it’s hard to call out just who would be a bad fit for the MCU, seeing as the filmmakers have proven adept at sidestepping some characters’ conceptual ridiculousness by playing coy (as in the case of Stilt-Man in Netflix’s Daredevil), or playing their entire adventure as farce (Howard the Duck in Guardians of the Galaxy). Heck, they even found ways to pull off racial caricatures via badass casting (Batroc in Captain America: Winter Soldier) via badass casting (in that case, MMA fighter Georges St-Pierre), so we didn’t bother including anyone with stereotypically cartoonish accents.

We’re also avoiding those saddled on unfortunate comic book readers by licensing deals (NFL Pro), blatant attempts to jump on pop culture trends (Dazzler, Ulysses. S. Archer), or real life figures who inexplicably guest-starred in Marvel Comics (Eminem, Barack Obama, Tim Gunn) or just straight up got their own titles (Billy Ray Cyrus).

Finally, we’ll be avoiding fan favorites like Marrow, Maggot, and Skin, going instead for the sorts of characters that no one in their right mind would include—the ones it’s difficult to find any sort of justification for in any context or medium. But then,  Marvel found a way to make a talking gun-toting raccoon in space work, so we extend our sincerest apologies in advance if any of these actually end up in the cinema at some point.

At any rate, don’t say we didn’t warn ya!

HINDSIGHT LAD/HINDSIGHT

marvel-8

Via Quora

With a name like Hindsight Lad, one could be forgiven for thinking this guy was a member of DC’s Legion of Super-Heroes (which has distinguished members such as Matter-Eater Lad and Color Kid), but this one’s all Marvel! Debuting in the pages of New Warriors, Hindsight Lad’s first costume included a cape and a football helmet with the side mirrors from a car attached to it. Having no powers, he initially tries to blackmail his way onto the team until an actual emergency convinces leader Night Thrasher to add him to their roster. Later on, the now-renamed “Hindsight” would continue his streak of endearing himself to precisely nobody by forging Avengers requisition forms to get himself a new costume.

 


X-TREME

marvel-7

Via Twitter

From his name to his outfit, X-Treme looks like someone took every excessive (X-cessive?) ‘90s comic book cliché they could find and applied them to this one guy (either that or someone was taking the piss out of Rob Liefeld). Gratuitous spikes all over his outfit (including his belt!)? Check. Obnoxious knee- and shoulder-pads? Double check. Backwards baseball cap? Check, check, and check. Don’t get us started on his mane of blond hair. The mind reels at what a director would do if they ever tried to update him.

 

Advertisements

BLUE STREAK

marvel-6

Via Outright Geekery

A former-SHIELD-Agent-turned-armored-Captain-America-villain? Great! Wait, his armor’s distinguishing feature is built-in roller skates that enable him to…skate at high speeds? Ah. Recent updates have seen Blue Streak’s skates replaced with roller blades? Oh. Well. Let’s move on.

 

BIG BERTHA

marvel-5

Via Nordeneregi.org

To be perfectly honest, this list could have been populated exclusively by members of the Great Lakes Avengers, whose  ranks include the likes of Flatman (who can turn himself two dimensional), and Leather Boy (a fetishist who mistook a call for heroes as a call for an S&M group). However, when all is said and done, it’s Big Bertha that makes the cut for her power to adjust the size, strength, and density of her body by becoming extraordinarily obese. Oh, and lest you assume this is a body positive sort of thing, she can shrink herself down to typical supermodel proportions…by vomiting out the excess mass. Lack of political correctness notwithstanding, we’ll hazard a guess and assume “Bulimia Babe” wasn’t already taken.

Pages: 1 2


1 2Next page
Total
1
Shares
1
0
0
Mikhail Lecaros

Mikhail Lecaros has been writing about movies and pop culture since 2012. Check out his movie podcast, Sub-Auters, and his all-out geekfest, Three Point Landing, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and Google Podcasts!


Previous Article
  • Pop

Young Adult Fantasy Novels That Were Made Into Movies

  • Posted on Nov 27, 2016Jan 26, 2018
  • Tynne De Leon
View Post
Next Article
  • Life

8 Ways to Give Back This Christmas Season

  • Posted on Nov 28, 2016Nov 28, 2016
  • Luanne Arevalo
View Post
You May Also Like
View Post
  • Pop

‘Pass, Walang Red Flag’: Netizens Give Reasons Why They Don’t Want Vico Sotto for President

  • Posted on May 16, 2022May 16, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara
View Post
  • Pop

8 Most Unlikely Places Where Supporters of Leni Robredo Have Campaigned

  • Posted on May 6, 2022
  • Meryl Medel
View Post
  • Pop

These Filipino-Am Students’ Modernized Tinikling Dance Gets Lil Nas X’s Attention

  • Posted on May 3, 2022May 3, 2022
  • Meryl Medel
View Post
  • Pop

‘Demon Slayer,’ ‘Spirited Away’: Somebody Give DOTr’s Social Media Team a Raise

  • Posted on May 3, 2022May 3, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara
View Post
  • Pop

‘Puro Nalang Half-Blooded’: The Internet Sounds Off About Celeste Cortesi as the New Miss Universe PH

  • Posted on May 2, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara
View Post
  • Pop

‘Worst Preliminary Competition’: Pinoy Pageant Fans Didn’t Hold Back Criticizing the MUPH 2022 Prelims

  • Posted on Apr 29, 2022Apr 29, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara
View Post
  • Pop

Uhh… The Tinder Swindler Just Invited Everyone to a Birthday Party in BGC This April 27

  • Posted on Apr 27, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara
View Post
  • Pop

ICYMI: All the References President Nadine Lustre Made in Her Witty Endorsement Video for VP Leni

  • Posted on Apr 26, 2022
  • Kyzia Maramara

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Get the l8est delivered right to your inbox.

8List.ph
  • About
  • Sitemap
  • Advertise
  • Privacy
  • Archive
  • Bitesized.ph
  • Windowseat.ph
Your daily dose of entertaining, useful and informative lists.

Input your search keywords and press Enter.